Thursday, August 29, 2013

a blog neglected, a life taking root?

check out what i used to wear...
now don't get me wrong, having a job afforded me both a place to live, and fancy clothes...but if i could do it all over again...maybe it would've been a little better if i spent less time worrying about my clothes and more time taking care of my body. then again, i'm sure being an insomniac didn't help me any.

if i could do it all over again, i would've been chomping on supplements from supersup.com rather than buying some of these clothes, yeah...or at least stall a bit before buying them. i guess i was 'greedy' for attention.

Friday, May 24, 2013

corruption everywhere, even in the design of video games

so, quite upset over trying to relax...i came to understand the values and importance of teamwork by playing some games. cooperation necessary, understanding encouraged, and selfishness discouraged. and yet fundamentally the arenas are often riddled with flaws.

if you are told that the price for a can of beans was $2, would you accept that and choose to buy it? well, if you thought the beans would provide some helpful nourishment, or at least provide some other purpose, perhaps food for your pig or other animal if you didn't like it. but what if you show up to the store and there is nothing available, and you must settle for either a can of peas/corn etc or you must pay 8 dollars for a can of beans via the traders outside the store? what if i told you that you were not allowed to buy the cans of beans while they were even inside the store? and that people were coming in behind you and the cans were miraculously appearing inside their shopping carts and disappearing from your own?

 you'd probably think that if beans were this annoying every time you go to the store, maybe you'd better forget about them. the same is happening with our video game events, and although i can't say i'm particularly upset...i can see that i should distance myself from these things by what is happening to these events. i was curious enough to attend an event last year, and i have to say it was a disappointment to say the least. and apparently this year i won't be attending one of these big events, and i can't say i feel bad about that. i feel good about it.

over the years i've slowly begun to realize that it takes very little to corrupt something or somebody, and that whatever that little wicked thing is, it is there, ready to pounce on anyone or anything.

my own problem? best said by the song 'hey you' by miranda cosgrove. 'if you would only see yourself the way you see everyone else'. for some reason, my own mind works against my body. what comes naturally to others is difficult to me. sure, some nice things can be said about me, perhaps something like 'you're the one that fixes me when i'm down. and you don't think twice, do you?'. but when all is said and done, i leave myself unfixed.